Cybersecurity without the superhero act
A sharp satire of the meetings, policies, board updates and nervous PowerPoints behind modern security work.
Available Soon
A cybersecurity satire by Lee Barnes
Certified in Sounding Official
The Accidental Rise of Britain's Worst CISO
Sounding official is easy. Being effective is harder.
A dry workplace satire about cybersecurity, promotion, boardrooms, buzzwords and the art of looking like you know what you are doing.
About the Book
Some people rise through competence. Crispin had a different strategy.
Crispin Lockwood-Fetch never set out to become a CISO. He simply discovered, quite early on, that he was exceptionally good at one thing: sounding official.
From helpdesk hero to boardroom favourite, Crispin charts his accidental ascent through the world of cybersecurity, armed with little more than a sharp suit, an impressive collection of buzzwords, and an unshakable belief that most problems can be solved by clearing the cache and delivering a confident PowerPoint.
Interspersed with the increasingly exasperated logs of his Head of Security Operations, Lauren Barnell, this is the painfully plausible story of how one man mastered the art of looking like he knew what he was doing... right up until the ransomware hit.
If you’ve ever sat through a security briefing and wondered whether confidence was doing more work than evidence, this is the book for you.
For Readers Who Enjoy
Corporate absurdity, cyber theatre and the paperwork of competence.
Office politics with a straight face
Career advancement, institutional confidence and the strange rewards available to people who sound more official than useful.
Logs, notes and uncomfortable evidence
Crispin’s version of events is quietly dismantled by Lauren Barnell’s increasingly precise record of what actually happened.
Availability
Available Soon
Release details and retailer links will be added here when confirmed.
Paperback
Print availability and direct purchase links coming soon.
Ebook
Digital edition details coming soon.
Audiobook
Audiobook edition currently in preparation. Details and sample audio will be added when available.
Author
Lee Barnes
Lee Barnes is a British novelist based in Birmingham and the founder of Hatchford Vale Press, the personal imprint under which he publishes his work.
His fiction explores the meeting point between people, institutions, technological systems and the small decisions that gradually gather weight.
His work often explores the language organisations use to explain themselves, reassure themselves and occasionally avoid looking too closely at what is happening.